Hashm-Ass
Twas the Night of the Hashmas
Twas the night of the Hashmas
When all through Haggin Oaks
Not a single person knew
Of the strange running folks
The trail had been laid
And the beer checks had been set
Soon there were to be Hashers
On that you can bet
The Hares were ready
For the Hashers to give chase
With visions of cheap beer
They were off with no haste
And No Hair with flour
And Mommy with Beer
Had just left the Hashers
To be chased soon like Deer
Soon the streets were filled
With “On Ons” and “R Us”
For the Hashers were running
To find some cheap booze
Away they ran
After the trail of flour
Hoping the beer was cold
And had not yet gone sour
The Christmas lights around
Were a colorful sight
That aided the runners
And gave them good light
They came upon X’s
All circled with O’s
At each they sent out
Fast women and quick Bro’s
With the Front Running Bastard
Ahead and so quick
We all heard calls of
“Slow down you stupid Dick”
More rapid than greyhounds
The Hashers all came
And Mommy soon shouted
And called out each name
“Now Super, now Dalai
Now Nipples, and Pussy
On Cockoff, on Butthook
Limp Noids don’t be a wussy
Come Kegel, come Tri Tit
Hurry up, don’t go slower
Come Diamond, come Exhibit
You too Diablower”
“All come and enjoy
A glass of cold beer
I’m glad you all found
The sign of Beer Near
Now off you all go
After No Hair give chase”
Said Mommy to us
“And have fun, this ain’t a race”
And so the Hashers left
Chasing Down Downs and Mirth
Never will you find weirder
Runners on this Earth
With names that confuse
And embarrass your Mom
We are the Hash House Harriers
Our club is the Bomb!